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Brad's morning edition
Check back with Omaha.com this afternoon for more jokes from Brad.
* Thursday was Take Our Daughters and Sons to Work Day. As part of an event in Washington, Michelle Obama showed a group of boys and girls what Joe Biden does. Now maybe they can explain to the rest of America what Joe Biden does.
* Metta World Peace brought his kids to work and the NBA immediately suspended them.
* On Saturday, there's a safety expo at Westroads. The No. 1 safety tip: Avoid the Westroads parking lot on a weekend.
* Lexus of Omaha is selling a $453,000 car. Who in town can afford that? Unless Warren Buffett decides to trade in the Rambler.
* Democrats in Congress are looking into extravagant spending by the General Services Administration. Imagine having a Democrat in Congress say you spend too much? It's like Curly from the Three Stooges making fun of your haircut.
* To prove he's not a wealthy elitist, President Obama said, "I wasn't born with a silver spoon in my mouth." Then aides rushed him off to a lunch that costs $35,000 per plate.
* Kim Kardashian said that she may run for mayor of Glendale, Calif. This will be the first time that a mayor attempts to lure a professional sports franchise to town by dating all the players.
* I need to remind Kim that being mayor requires a four-year commitment. It's not something like marriage, where after 72 days you're out.
* A hologram maker wants to "bring Elvis back to life" so he can sing with Justin Bieber. This makes that North Korean nuclear test only the second worst idea of 2012.
* The Cleveland Indians handed the Royals their 12th straight loss. That puts it in perspective - you're playing a professional sports franchise from Cleveland and you're the disappointing organization.
* The NFL draft began on Thursday. Per tradition, I'll be releasing my mock draft on Friday.
* It was a wild first round. The Seattle Seahawks surprised everyone and drafted "troubled linebacker Bruce Irvin." The Cincinnati Bengals were stunned and disappointed because they thought they had traded up to get every "troubled" player available.
* Despite the fact he'd been arrested this year, Irvin was still selected early. After hearing this, one guy leapt up and down in excitement - it was Alfonzo Dennard.