Breaking Brad: Husker hoops coach finalizes deal - Omaha.com
Published Wednesday, May 16, 2012 at 1:30 pm / Updated at 12:22 pm
Breaking Brad: Husker hoops coach finalizes deal

Brad Dickson's humor column, "Breaking Brad" appears daily on Omaha.com and in The World-Herald. To read more from Brad, check out his past columns at omaha.com/dickson and follow him on Twitter.

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Brad's afternoon edition

Read Brad's morning edition here.

* Sixty-nine people have applied to be the new Omaha police chief. Sure, why not? Serving as police chief of Omaha is a great way to kill four months.

* I had six seconds of free time this morning, so I listened to Jon Bruning's concession speech again in its entirety.

* President Obama just released financial records showing he may be worth up to $10 million. Not to be outdone, Mitt Romney is releasing his financial records, which are being delivered by the USS Nimitz.

* The U.S. Senate has scheduled hearings on Secret Service misconduct for May 23. The Secret Service agents still don't get it - they asked if they can bring dates.

* On Tuesday, Mitt Romney spoke at a Des Moines hotel. In what could be a sign, as he was walking through the hotel lobby he stepped on a missing Romney vote from the Iowa caucuses.

* More information is coming out about the Obama fundraiser at George Clooney's house. Apparently, the event lasted nearly four hours. It was so long, during the fundraiser Clooney went through three girlfriends.

* President Obama has recorded a series of positive campaign ads called "Go." In this day and age, for a person running for office to record positive ads, they should be called "What?"

* Everything in these ads is positive. For example, weighing in on the Secret Service agent who owed the prostitute $800 but only offered 39 bucks, Obama praises this as part of the "new frugality."

* Three JPMorgan executives have resigned after costing the firm $2 billion, just as Americans were regaining faith in the financial system. It turns out JP stands for "Just Pathetic."

* A lawsuit against the controversial author of the book "Three Cups of Tea" has been dismissed. He said this is the second-most-embarrassing experience of his life, right after being behind Levi Johnston on the bestseller list.

* New NU basketball coach Tim Miles signed a seven-year contract. NU officials had no choice after word leaked that Benny the bedbug-sniffing dog had a six-year deal.

* As part of his incentives, Miles will receive $300,000 for winning a national championship. For some reason when I think about that, the Mega Millions thing about the odds being greater than being stuck by lightning keeps popping into my head.

* Floyd Mayweather Jr.'s entourage for his fight with Miguel Cotto included rapper 50 Cent. Which was appropriate. When Don King was in his heyday, out of a $20 million purse, 50 cents is what the fighter got to keep.

* The spacecraft Voyager is approaching the end of our solar system. Tuesday night it had to dodge one of LeBron James' errant free throw attempts during the Heat's loss to Indiana.

Contact the writer: Brad Dickson

brad.dickson@owh.com    |   402-444-1019    |  

Brad comments in a funny way on topical events in the news and the wide world of sports.

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