* * * * * * * * * *
Brad's morning edition
* Friday night Huey Lewis and the News play a free concert in Memorial Park. Which should be good if they play the old hits. Maybe not so much if it's nothing but material from The News' latest album.
* To reserve places for the evening concert, some Omahans set out lawn chairs and blankets at 5 a.m. and then went to work. If you did that in my old home of Los Angeles, by 7 your lawn chairs and blankets would be for sale on eBay.
* Thursday night the U.S. House of Representatives voted whether to hold Attorney General Eric Holder in contempt. The voting was marred when 25 Tea Party members voted to hold Supreme Court Chief Justice John Roberts in contempt for his health care ruling earlier that day.
* Thursday the U.S. Supreme Court announced the historic decision on health care. Before the announcement, the tension was so thick it felt like "The Today Show" set.
* This is embarrassing. A local Omaha TV station interrupted the announcement on the historic Supreme Court ruling to inform us that Michael Phelps still had not regrown his mustache.
* Michele Bachmann called it a travesty, a disaster and appalling. Not the Supreme Court ruling, no, she was talking about "Magic Mike," the movie about male strippers that opened today.
* An estimated 150 million Americans are unhappy about the Supreme Court ruling. Normally you don't see 150 million Americans unhappy until the final BCS football ratings come out.
* Friday morning the U.S. launched a new satellite. I thought I heard a sonic boom, but it was just the thermometer in my backyard exploding from the heat.
* The highest ranking military officer in the country, the Joint Chief of Staff, visited Omaha this week. He was here to observe our Fourth of July fireworks preparedness, which could potentially be used to create the world's most powerful explosive device.
* It is estimated that the entire world population weighs about 316 tons. The entire world population immediately began rationalizing that's probably after lunch, with shoes on.
* Hundreds of passenger at JFK Airport were evacuated after it was noticed that a TSA employee's metal detector was unplugged. Wasn't this a scene in "Police Academy IV"?
* MSNBC jut made a huge announcement. Unfortunately, because it was made on MSNBC, nobody has any idea what the announcement was.
* In Democratic debate preparation, John Kerry is playing Mitt Romney. Kerrey is a wealthy guy from Massachusetts with big hair - how'd they ever think to use him as Romney?
* I understand the little guy from Penn and Teller will be playing Ron Paul.
* Kerry has Romney down to a tee. He even arrived in a station wagon with a dog in a crate on the roof.
* Romney's top candidates for running mate reportedly include Sen. Bob Portman, former Minnesota Gov. Tim Pawlenty and...zzzz...oops, I nodded off there for a second.
* Twenty-seven polling places in Douglas County are reopening. This means our seniors will no longer have to cross creeks via rope ladders to vote.
* The president of J.C. Penney is leaving. This, after J.C. Penney has been losing out to its chief competition, which at this point I imagine is Dollar Tree and garage sales.
* Moody's downgraded some banks by three notches. Bank of America, for example, is now rated Baa2. What this means in layman's terms: Instead of investing in Bank of America stock, you'd be better off wagering the money at Bluff's Run.
* On the show "My Big Fat American Gypsy Wedding," two first cousins were just married. I don't know much about this program, but I'm going out on a limb and guessing that it's not on PBS.