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Brad's morning edition. Check back this afternoon for more jokes from Brad.
* Wednesday night at the Democratic National Convention, the guests included people from various professions – a policeman, a teacher, a baker, a dog catcher. Wait, my mistake, those were actually the replacement NFL referees on the other channel.
* It was the NFL season opener vs. the Democratic National Convention. The main difference is that Dez Bryant had a larger security detail than President Obama.
* Bill Clinton spoke at the Democratic National Convention on Wednesday night. At the end of his speech, Clinton made his nomination for president of the United States – Hillary Clinton in 2016.
* Clinton spoke for almost an hour. Newt Gingrich said, “I've had marriages that didn't last that long.”
* Clinton's speech was so moving that at the end, Mitt Romney jumped up shouting, “Yes! Oh, wait.”
* Clinton pleaded with voters to give President Obama another chance. Pleading to give somebody another chance – it sounds like this was leftover from a talk Bill had with Hillary in the '90s.
* Because Hillary is in China, Democrats kept their fingers crossed that Bill didn't bring a date.
* President Obama's Thursday night speech has been moved indoors because of the threat of rain. Democrats had no choice. It would have looked pretty stupid for Joe Biden to stand there holding the umbrella over Obama's head.
* Some Democrats are criticizing weathercasters for earlier predicting clear skies. It's a tad hypocritical for a party that was off by $11 trillion in its national debt prediction to criticize someone else for a blown forecast.
* Amid much rancor, Democrats added the word “God” to their platform. Now the only words you won't hear during the convention are “Keystone XL pipeline.”
* Iowa is considered a crucial swing state. I'm trying to confirm that to win over Iowa independent voters, President Obama is legally changing his middle name from Hussein to Santorum.
* An Iowa delegates breakfast was held at the convention. A little different – an Obama aide served the Iowa delegation breakfast in bed.
* Mitt Romney said, “I never paid less than 13 percent" in taxes. Is that supposed to impress voters, knowing that Romney is in a tax bracket four lower than Warren Buffett's secretary?
* Snooki gave birth to a boy. At the age of 7 days he was already the most mature person in the “Jersey Shore” house.
* We have witnessed some great love stories on television the past two weeks. Mitt and Ann Romney; Barack and Michelle Obama; Ed Cunningham and the sound of his own voice.
* The NFL season kicked off with the Dallas Cowboys defeating the New York Giants. The Cowboys won despite being called for having 13 men in the field. The extra two guys were members of Dez Bryant's security detail.