Breaking Brad: Swearing in Obama, again and again - Omaha.com
Published Wednesday, January 2, 2013 at 12:01 am / Updated at 11:13 am
Breaking Brad: Swearing in Obama, again and again

Brad Dickson's humor column, "Breaking Brad" appears daily on Omaha.com and in The World-Herald. To read more from Brad, check out his past columns at omaha.com/dickson and follow him on Twitter.

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Brad's morning edition. Check back this afternoon for more jokes from Brad.

* The Obamas rang in the new year in traditional fashion. At the stroke of midnight, everyone gathered in front of photos of Mitt Romney, Paul Ryan and John Boehner and sang “Should old acquaintance be forgot.”

* The House passed a plan to stave off the fiscal cliff. This means “Big Ten team wins bowl game” is only the second most shocking headline of the past week.

* Mostly, Congress pushed the big fiscal decisions down the road. If Congress was in charge of New Year's Eve, the Times Square ball drop would happen in mid-March.

* There is simply no explanation for the intransigence of the House of Representatives. Staving off the fiscal cliff prevented a $900 Congressional pay increase from automatically kicking in. OK, now there's an explanation for the intransigence of the House of Representatives.

* President Obama got most of what he wanted in fiscal-cliff negotiations. While he was on a roll, Obama sold some swamp land in Florida he's been looking to unload to a group of Republican senators.

* A partial deal was reached in the House after Democrats and Republicans found some common ground – they're all bumbling, incompetent oafs.

* One of the big hang-ups in fiscal-cliff negotiations has been the so-called death tax. Which is not to be confused with the proposed “posthumous property tax” proposal in Omaha.

* President Obama is going to be sworn into office on Sunday, Jan 20, and then again on Monday, Jan. 21. Supposedly, it's because the 20th is a Sunday, but we all really know it's to rub salt in the Republicans' wounds.

* There's so much rancor in Washington that I wouldn't be surprised to see Obama sworn into office every day through mid-August.

* Several members of the U.S. Congress are trying to stop MTV from airing a new show called “Buckwild” because it features people acting drunk and stupid. What's wrong, is the U.S. Congress afraid of a little competition?

* The DVD of the Husker game with Georgia should sell pretty well in Nebraska. But the big seller will be the DVD of just the first half.

Contact the writer: Brad Dickson

brad.dickson@owh.com    |   402-444-1019    |  

Brad comments in a funny way on topical events in the news and the wide world of sports.

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