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Brad's morning edition. Check back this afternoon for more jokes from Brad.
* The City of Omaha is warning residents to remove snow and ice from sidewalks in front of their homes or face a fine. The city says some are too slow to remove snow and ice. This is part of that new Omaha “Pot Calls the Kettle Black” law.
* If you do not clear your sidewalks of snow and ice, the city will do it for you – in March, I'm guessing.
* Businessinsider.com has named Omaha the most hungover city in the U.S. Is there time to squeeze that onto our 2013 license plates?
* Omaha is the most hungover city. That finally explains why there's a Scooter's on every other corner.
* In May, the Beach Boys are going to open Council Bluffs' new River's Edge Park, which faces the Missouri River. That's appropriate since two of the original Beach Boys were members of the Lewis and Clark expedition that crossed the Missouri.
* On Wednesday, 84 new members of the House of Representatives were sworn in. I wouldn't say expectations are low, but the last line of the oath was, “What do we have to lose?”
* I think it was just nice to see that many members of Congress holding their right hands aloft who were not preparing to testify on their own behalf at trial.
* John Boehner was re-elected as speaker of the House. I'd have thought this was only possible if he was running against Spiro Agnew.
* Boehner was re-elected as speaker. This is reminiscent of the time that Curly and Larry agreed that despite their differences, Moe should be the official head Stooge.
* Boehner will reportedly listen more to Democrats. If he listens to Democrats, you don't even want to know where he'll be sticking his gavel.
* After Boehner scrubbed a vote on Hurricane Sandy relief, some say he can never set foot in New Jersey again. That makes no sense – Boehner blows it and then they turn around and reward him?
* I wouldn't say that Boehner has taken a big fall, but he just applied for the job of Omaha assistant parking manager.
* It's now reported that during fiscal-cliff negotiations, Boehner told Harry Reid to “Go (blank) yourself.” Just when you think the level of discourse in Washington can't get any lower, members of Congress go and surprise you.
* Stanford coach David Shaw snubbed an ESPN reporter who was trying to get an interview after the Rose Bowl. Bo Pelini will be studying film of Shaw in the offseason to learn exactly how he did it.
* A couple in New York is suing a golf course after 1,200 golf balls were found in their yard. The last straw occurred when they were eating Thanksgiving dinner and a golfer trudged through the dining room asking if it was OK if he played through.