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Brad's afternoon edition. Click here to read his morning edition.
* The Arizona Border Patrol just made the largest such find in its history, uncovering $12 million worth of marijuana. This was either the product of a super sophisticated international drug smuggling ring, or it fell out the back of Willie Nelson's tour bus.
* Per Omaha.com, several residents of a Sioux City, Iowa, neighborhood report it is "less stinky" now. This sounds like the worst "Visit Sioux City" campaign ever. "We don't smell as bad as we used to."
* The U.S. Figure Skating Championships will pump an estimated $10 million into the local economy. And that's just to Omahans who sew sequins onto costumes.
* Harry Reid and counterpart Mitch McConnell have reportedly reached a series of compromises that "fall far short of demands." Probably the key compromise here is that Democrats and Republicans are going to take turns refilling the paper towel dispenser in the congressional restroom.
* President Obama is bring criticized for not reaching out socially to members of Congress. Obama said he invited several congressmen to dinner. It's their own fault that after showing up, they decided they didn't want to pay the $10,000 per plate.
* Obama has vowed to not be as aloof with members of Congress. Oh, he's still not going to hang with them, but he's gonna have his limo driver stop going 15 miles out of the way so that he doesn't have to pass the House of Representatives.
* The White House just rejected petitions that would allow South Carolina and Alabama to secede and for the U.S. to deport Piers Morgan. The worst case scenario would be, if through some horrific mix-up, Piers Morgan was deported to Alabama.
* A Queens, N.Y., city council candidate is suing a nightclub, claiming she was bitten by a rat. A rat allegedly bit a political candidate. I'd like to take a moment to congratulate the rat for his good sense.
* A rat bit a U.S. politician. I'll chalk this up to professional rivalry.
* The world's oldest cat has turned 25 years old. He spends most of the day sleeping and laying about. The world's oldest cat sounds a lot like the world's youngest cat.
* Dunkin' Donuts now has a gluten-free menu. Only Americans would walk out of a restaurant having consumed 6,000 calories worth of sugary dough and 20 ounces of caffeine and go, “Well I got the health thing covered -- no gluten.”
* McDonald's is experimenting with a mobile app to make it easier to buy food. Are there really a lot of people walking around saying, “You know, I'd love to get some of that fast food, but I just don't know how to go about it?”
* Manti Te'o has hired the same P.R. firm as Alec Baldwin. That's ingenious. If there's one celebrity who never gets any bad publicity, it's Alec Baldwin.
* Te'o is skipping the Senior Bowl. OK, he's already starting to show better judgment.