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Brad's morning edition. Check back this afternoon for more jokes from Brad.
* Today is Presidents Day and this Sunday is the Oscar ceremony – the two days of the year when we pay tribute to our best actors.
* There is a new way of celebrating Presidents Day. You run up a big debt, hang out with a bunch of celebrities and check into an overpriced vacation home.
* I am celebrating Washington's birthday in traditional fashion. I will don a powder wig, chop down a cherry tree and then admit guilt.
* Presidents Day is not to be confused with a new holiday where you mess everything up, refuse to take accountability and walk into walls – Congressman's Day.
* President Obama is enjoying a brief getaway to Palm City, Fla. I'm guessing a brief getaway for Obama is about three weeks.
* Famed instructor Butch Harmon gave President Obama a golf lesson to improve his game. Before they meet again, can someone check and see if Harmon knows anything about a job-creation plan?
* Over the weekend in Florida, President Obama played golf with Tiger Woods. That's more competitive than you'd think. This year Woods has only one more PGA tournament win than Obama.
* Some say with all the problems in our country, it didn't send the proper message for President Obama to play golf with Tiger Woods. It could've been worse. Obama could have played with Bill Murray as Murray donned a camel head to hit out of a sand trap.
* Obama played golf with Tiger Woods. Considering how important golf is to the president, this means now the birth of his children and winning the presidency are only the second- through fourth-biggest events in his life.
* When Obama was down in Palm City, a wind-chill advisory was issued because temperatures were not expected to climb above 60 degrees. I'll pause for a second so all Nebraskans reading this can fall to the floor laughing.
* USA Today got hold of the first draft of President Obama's new immigration plan. Now USA Today editors are working round the clock to break down the 700-page report into one huge pie chart.
* A new “Die Hard” movie is out. This one's called “Die Hard V: We Want The Rest of Your Money, America.”
* On Friday and Saturday nights, the UNO hockey team played at Alaska-Anchorage. OK, I don't want any more bellyaching from Nebraska football fans about making Big Ten road trips.
* Winners at the Westminster Kennel Club Dog Show were selected on criteria including countenance, carriage, coat and attentiveness. If I was in charge, it'd solely be based on Frisbee catching ability.