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Brad's morning edition. Check back this afternoon for more jokes from Brad.
* Good news: The Midwest drought may be easing and the grass soon greening up. Bad news: We won't see the green grass because the snow cover will last through August.
* There was a huge, long buildup to the snowstorm, and then it paled somewhat compared to what was expected. Local weather forecasters introduced a new term, “the meteorological mulligan.”
* Our next potential winter storm is in northwest Canada. Unfortunately, so are the private contractors the city hired to clear the side streets after this storm.
* It should take private contractors a couple days on the side streets. And that's just to clear all the brine the city dumped on 'em. Then, they'll start on the snow.
* Breaking news -- the list of cancellations has been canceled.
* We could get two more storms in the next week. If that happens, Omaha essentially stops being a city and is rendered an enormous pothole with huge taxes.
* Iowa Gov. Terry Branstad has launched a new campaign to lure California businesses to Iowa. Well, he certainly picked a good week for that.
* If you missed Branstad shouting “Come To Iowa” from under the seven-foot snowdrift, it was something else.
* The brightest minds in the world have discovered something called the Higgs boson particle that allows them to predict how long the universe will last. And even these scientists can't figure out Omaha's emergency snow parking policy.
* Snowfall totals differ greatly. That's why I'm proclaiming today TGIF -- Thank Goodness It''s Not Falls City.
* Omaha is expecting possible second and third snowstorms next week. This is either the worst series of storms to hit town since 2009, or some kind of sick plan to draw Jim Flowers out of hiding.
* The Mars rover Curiosity is trying to determine if Mars has a habitable climate. Right now, I'm having serious doubts over whether Omaha has a habitable climate.
* On Thursday night, Downtown Omaha was eerily quiet and basically deserted. It felt like the Red Sky Music Festival was back.
* All the networks are covering the winter storm in Nebraska and Kansas. The big angle on CNN: “There is no way of telling how this will impact stalled Carnival cruise ships.”