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Brad's morning edition. Check back this afternoon for more jokes from Brad.
* The second annual Omaha Duathlon was held Sunday. I'm pioneering a new thing called the Noathlon.
* In Arlington, Va., a new bus stop that cost $1.1 million opened. I'd make fun of this if I didn't live in a city that's dropping $2 billion on a sewer.
* The “60 Minutes” Twitter account was hacked. Enjoy your fun, bad guys. Imagine the shock when, six weeks from now, Morley Safer and Scott Pelley burst into a dorm room in Thailand going, “You have a moment, sir?”
* In June, President Obama will be making his first visit to Berlin as president. Either it's an important state visit or that's “'The View' Goes to Germany” week.
* In a desperate attempt to get Obama to Nebraska, some officials are calling for building a wall between Omaha and Council Bluffs and then tearing it down “in the name of freedom.”
* The end of the air traffic controllers furlough was delayed because of a typo on the document that reached the president's desk. Only the current Congress could have an oh-so-rare bipartisan agreement stymied by a typo.
* About 15,000 air traffic controllers were furloughed. That made for some awkward situations. For example, take the pilot who came over the intercom to ask: “Can anyone tell if that's the Atlanta airport we're approaching?”
* The last player chosen in the NFL draft is known as “Mr. Irrelevant.” I heard “Mr. Irrelevant” on television; at first I assumed Joe Biden was being introduced at the White House Correspondents' Dinner.
* At the White House correspondents dinner Gangnam Style” “singer” Psy was seated beside Charlie Rose. I'm going to guess there wasn't a lot of small talk.
* The White House Correspondents' Dinner was sort of like the Emmys, only with more TV stars.
* South Carolina Gov. Nikki Haley called Washington “psychotic.” Al Gore called Congress “pathetic.” To paraphrase the dean in “Animal House”: “Pathetic and psychotic is no way to go through life.”
* I don't think that's appropriate to call Washington psychotic or pathetic. Instead I'd go with “Doofus-esque.”
* The Sears CEO will receive an annual salary of $1 but have the chance to make millions in performance bonuses. I doubt we see a contract like this again until the Kansas City Chiefs try to sign the first draft pick.
* In the NFL draft, Tyrann Mathieu, the Honey Badger, was selected in the third round by Brent Musburger.
* After being selected in the NFL draft, players always bear hug the commissioner. Better idea: To see which team really got the best linemen, they should see how many times they can bench press him.
* The Bulls-Nets game in the NBA playoffs went three overtimes. How awkward was this for Nets bench warmer Kris Humphries when he realized that the game had lasted longer than his marriage?