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Brad's afternoon edition. Click here to read Brad's morning jokes.
* We need to begin labeling Mayor Jean Stothert and Omaha Fire Department confrontations like they do Super Bowls. I believe this is Stothert-Fire Dept. Blow Up XXXVII.
* The new Council Bluffs eagle monument will not be ready in time for Veterans Day. If this is anything remotely similar to the Council Bluffs overpass artwork I've seen, take your time. No hurry.
* Vice President Biden called Boston's new mayor, Marty Walsh, after Tuesday's election. There was only one problem: Biden got the wrong Marty Walsh. It's just a good thing a guy named Steve Johnson wasn't elected mayor of Boston, or Biden would've been dialing strangers all night.
* The Twitter IPO was valued at $14.2 billion, obviously by someone who's never been on Twitter.
* Fans in attendance at the Kansas State women's basketball game vs. Tennessee State on Friday will receive free bacon. I'm expecting more people than for the Nebraska-Michigan football game at the Big House.
* The Chicago Cubs have hired Rick Renteria as their new manager. The biggest enticement to taking the job as Cubs manager? You get Octobers off.
* The 47th Country Music Association Awards show aired Thursday evening. I believed that's the 47th this year.
* It was sort of like a Republican National Convention, with the main difference being there was more criticism leveled at President Obama at the CMAs.
* A Red Sox fan dressed her dog up with a fake beard on Halloween. This ought to be worth another 200-year curse.
* Brett Favre, 44, recently turned down a St. Louis Rams offer to exit retirement. Favre is a grandfather. You think the NFL refs protect quarterbacks now. "That will be 15 yards for a late hit and another 15 for tackling Grandpa."
* Mike Shanahan called former player Albert Haynesworth “lazy.” Haynesworth said he'd have no response until after his seven-hour afternoon nap.
* The Florida Everglades minor league hockey team started a 58-year-old goalie in a game. You know Florida is a retirement mecca when its goalies are 58.
* For the second time in a month, an NHL player pulled his own tooth on the bench. This makes the NBA player who missed the opener because of a slowly healing hangnail look even worse.